What are DEIA-focused Empathy Circles?

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Doing Diversity/Equity/Inclusion/Accessibility (DEIA) work is not simply telling people how to think about DEIA. It is co-creating a culture where every person feels like they are heard; they are included; and they belong. DEIA-focused Empathy Circles help us get better at reflective listening and understanding each other. During them, we create a culture of empathy and belonging. They are not support groups, but they make us feel supported. They are not work groups but they make us feel like we worked on ourselves. They help us feel heard, connected, and like we belong. We all take turns mindfully speaking and reflectively listening according to the structured dialogue protocol of Empathy Circles. I add my Empathy Unchained™ DEIA Card Deck to provide convo starters.

Some past convo starters we used are:

• What is one core value that makes you interested in doing DEIAJB work?—or whatever is alive for you. 
• What do you need at your org in order to feel psychologically safe or that you belong?
• How can we implement more people-first language at our org?
• What can be done to reduce cultural taxation?
• Which identities (e.g., race, class, language, gender/sex expression/orientation, ability/disability, etc.) make you “powerful” in our society? Which identities make you “less powerful”?
  (All convo starters add the option to speak about “whatever is alive for you”.)

Quotes from past participants from all over the world:

• I used to not hear what people said, because I was so busy thinking about my response. I learned to really hear from doing Empathy Circles.
• It is such hard work to slow down and reflect back to people what they said. I have to use all of my body and brain power.
• Using people-first language helps me put the “human” first and the “group” second. It softens the edges of my bias.
• I did not even know what Cultural Taxation was before this Empathy Circle.
• This is the first time I have felt completely heard [at work].
• After what we have experienced in this Empathy Circle… We are all brothers and sisters now (smile).
• I feel more included when there is diversity around me. It means that everyone’s ideas are different. Therefore, no one gets othered, because their perspective is an outlier.
• I cannot believe how much I connected with everyone in this room—even though this was on zoom.

 Contact Dr. Felicia Darling to learn more. Also, you can become an Empathy Circle Facilitator for free or by donation at the Empathy Center and be part of the global empathy movement.

BIO: Dr. Felicia Darling is a precalculus and calculus lecturer at UC Berkeley and tenured faculty at Santa Rosa Junior College. She is the author of Empathy Unchained™: Heal Your Trauma, Uplift the World, the Empathy Unchained™ DEIA Conversation Deck, and Teachin’ It! She completed her Fulbright-winning ethnographic research when she completed a PhD at Stanford University. She writes, speaks, and researches about inclusion, active math learning, and trauma-informed education. She teaches math, teacher education, yoga, empathy circles, and meditation in Northern California.

Don’t Be Nice. Fight the Bullies. Bullying, Racism, Hate Groups Exist Because Nice People Enable Them.

Many “nice” bullies get away with it, because they are good at navigating and exploiting politeness-oriented cultures. Also, many “nice” people do not want to know that injustice and bullying exists in their workplaces, communities, and country. In fact, Black racism exists because it works for many—and others just plain do not care. Many people engage in what I call, “I don’t care-ism.” Black racism does not affect them, so they don’t care about it. 

Here are four tips to stop bullying:

1) Don’t pretend bullying doesn’t exist around you just because it’s easier for you. It promotes bullying and gives bullies permission.

2) Don’t tell people who are suffering from bullying that the bully is nice. Just try to listen. Be present and empathetic.

3) Heal your own trauma around bullying. Maybe when you were young, you had to pretend your bully was nicer than they were in order to survive. You don’t have to do that anymore. You are an adult.

4) Explore your own implicit biases around race, age, sexual orientation, gender identity, religion, country of origin, disability, color, genetic information, veteran status, body types, language, socioeconomic class, or incarcerated status.

Thanks,

Felicia

Mariana Barragán Torres (UCLA) and Felicia Darling (SRJC) partnered together to publish their article in Spanish in January, 2021. It is about Felicia’s ethnographic study that explored the cultural assets related to mathematics in a Yucatec Maya village and how the results can inform education policy in México. The article, Estrategias comunitarias de resolución de problemas matemáticos en una comunidad maya en Yucatán, is published in the peer-reviewed scientific journal by the Universidad Iberoamericana. Also, Mariana and Felicia were invited to present the paper in Spanish at an education policy conference run by the Universidad Iberoamericana on February 18 at 2:00pm (PT). To register for the 10-minute presentation, go here https://ibero.zoom.us/meeting/register/tJcqdeqvqDsqEtcalQeOlZSFPAcpWmST3Asb

A new article that I wrote for NISOD ahead of my upcoming workshop series on how to facilitate inclusive, online instruction… “The Promise and Pitfalls of Eliminating Remedial Courses in Community Colleges,” Felicia Darling, Math Instructor at the Santa Rosa Junior College (CA), explores how colleges can reach and teach all incoming students. Here is the link  https://www.nisod.org/2020/08/24/nisod-papers-no-18/

“Obviously, it is not feasible for community college instructors to conduct ethnographic studies on their students every semester. Also, students’ cultural backgrounds vary widely within a class. However, drawing from my research and teaching experience, I piloted an activity in a community college math classroom that allowed students to solve problems that were culturally relevant to them. In a pre-statistics math class, the very first math class that many community college students take, I assigned the following task for homework:”

You can access the full article on the Teachers College Press Blog. This article was originally published as an Innovation Abstracts, Volume XLII, No. 25, July 9, 2020, by the National Institute for Staff and Organizational Development (NISOD) at The University of Texas at Austin.

Feel a wee bit stressed, low-energy, or anxious? This is a great way to rejuvenate and relax for an hour. First we will check in and land in the room. This will be followed by some relaxing, diaphragmatic breathing exercises. Then we will do a joyful body scan that I call, Little Points of Light Body Scan. One person remarked after the body scan, “I feel like the Milky Way.” Finally, we will do a comfortable optional sitting or lying meditation for 30 minutes, where we bring our attention back to our breath. Participants may pick up tools to help navigate stressful moments, since research shows that diaphragmatic breathing, somatic awareness, & mindfulness meditation help down-regulate the sympathetic nervous system. Here is the link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgE4l6qSSgE

Community College Instructors are Front Line Workers in the Time of Coronavirus. Tips to Make it Work.

“The bottom line is that community college instructors are on the front lines during this coronavirus pandemic. We are showing up to teach students how to be successful in college, as always. However, now we are doing it, while we all are simultaneously navigating a global crisis. While medical first responders are risking their lives to quell the rise in cases, we are doing our parts to make sure that students emerge from this crisis, healthy and continuing on their journey to achieve their educational dreams. Our continued work ensures that in a post-coronavirus world, social and economic mobility will continue to become increasingly attainable for all students.”